# Mantis "Your Mama" jokes



## agent A (Mar 3, 2012)

Not directed at anyone in particular, but I am starting this topic so we can make "your mama" jokes only peeps on this forum would understand  

Here r a few of mine

Your mama is so dumb, she went on the forum looking for a male brunneria borealis

Your mama is so dumb, she overfed a hierodula

Your mama is so poor, I saw her carrying around a net cage and asked wat she was doing, she said she was moving

 

Anyone else have any? These r meant to be funny and not offensive


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

Your Mama is so old when I asked her if i could get an Idolo she said they were very rare in the hobby

It is the only one I could think of


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

I do not understand. Does peeps mean young people?


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

Yup


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## hibiscusmile (Mar 3, 2012)

good, then I am in the right place!!! :tt2:


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## Mvalenz (Mar 3, 2012)

Your mama is so dumb she thinks she has two mantids, but its just one that molted. She keeps trying to feed it too.

Get it?


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

This is strange.


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

Mvalenz said:


> Your mama is so dumb she thinks she has two mantids, but its just one that molted. She keeps trying to feed it too.
> 
> Get it?


I get it!



happy1892 said:


> This is strange.


Why?


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## agent A (Mar 3, 2012)

Mvalenz said:


> Your mama is so dumb she thinks she has two mantids, but its just one that molted. She keeps trying to feed it too.
> 
> Get it?


Lol that's funny

Here's another of mine:

Your mama is so dumb she dehydrated a Blepharopsis mendica


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

Hertarem45 said:


> I get it!
> 
> Why?


It is supposed to be funny. I do not think it is funny.


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

Well then go to another post! we all like it


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

OK.


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

You know I am kidding


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## mkayum (Mar 3, 2012)

:lol:


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

Hertarem45 said:


> You know I am kidding


I did not know!


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

ok. Nevermind. But if you didnt get my joke I will explain it to you.

Idolos are now really common/popualr in this hobby but about a year or 2 ago they were rare. So since your mom is so old she still thinks Idolos are rare


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## agent A (Mar 3, 2012)

Lol your mama is so old when she saw a mantis she said "last time I checked that thing had a flat body and scurried along the forest floor at night and we called it a roach"


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

Is this not nice?


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## agent A (Mar 3, 2012)

happy1892 said:


> I will try to make a joke like that.


Yay :clap:


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

Dear Folks F.Y.I.:

(I am Happy1892's Father.) My son does not get certain types of jokes or humor situations well because he has autism. However, he does not have animosity, either, over just about anything, which I think is unusual, and a good thing. He is thirteen, and we just got a diagnosis of him being in the autistic spectrum about two and a half weeks ago. He was born in South Korea and stayed there until April of 2011. He did not attend school much so no teacher picked up on it (praise the Lord! . . . I never liked school, either).	Too, his degree of autism is mild. He cannot handle loud noises well. Nor, can he function well around a large number of people.

He really does not get jokes well, but he says to tell you that two of the jokes he read here were a little bit funny to him. Interestingly, he gets jokes from the sitcoms I got for him to glean more English vocabulary while in South Korea: M*A*S*H, Hogan's Heroes, I Dream of Jeannie, I Love Lucy, The Flying Nun, F Troop, Star Trek TNG, TAGS, and a whole bunch others. Irony is something I noticed he picked up on more quickly than my other children and my wife (South Korean). I thought that odd. However, I can see that he needs to work on his "Your Momma" jokes.

Thanks for running such a kind forum. My son loves this place and thrives here, learns a lot, and feels valued.


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

Understood


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## happy1892 (Mar 3, 2012)

My Son says this is not funny: Yo Mamma is so dumb she thought a Blue Bottle Fly was some fancy new kind of Molotov Cocktail.

This was my feeble attempt at humor. He is working on a joke. He is getting kind of complicated, talking about it right now. I will try to guide his humor. Anyway, he says mine is not so funny. I agree, but it is the best I can do right now. Plus, I know little about mantii and their needs, for raising them. I tried raising some forty some years ago, as a kid, and failed every time, did not know how to feed the L1 nymphs.


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## CoolMantid (Mar 3, 2012)

Well at least you know what an L1 nymph is. Its a start! I was so confused when I got my first mantis!


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## agent A (Mar 3, 2012)

Very interesting story

Now I understand, and I remember the scramble to feed my first mantis (eventually caught Mosquitos outside and raised it-beginners luck lol)

I'd be lost without this forum, it's doing so much better than mine lol

I will watch a few episodes of those sitcoms to see if I can apply its comedy to a joke for this topic


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## sporeworld (Mar 4, 2012)

Yo momma is so fat:

When she lays around the ooth... she really laaaaaaays arooooound the ooth!

She keeps checking for new postings in the "Food and Feeding" section.

She gets excited when she hears the phrase "egg case".

She makes a Hierodula feel like a Heterochaeta!!!

Yo momma is so old:

She remembers when Rhombodera only had one species!

She helped (insert favorite old forum members name) catch his.her first mantis!

She picked "Mantodea" as the name for the order!


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## sporeworld (Mar 4, 2012)

_(Not a Yo Momma joke, but....)_

Why can't you hear a Pseudocreobotra go to the bathroom...?

Because the P is silent!


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## angelofdeathzz (Mar 4, 2012)

happy1892 said:


> Dear Folks F.Y.I.:
> 
> (I am Happy1892's Father.) My son does not get certain types of jokes or humor situations well because he has autism.
> 
> Thanks for running such a kind forum. My son loves this place and thrives here, learns a lot, and feels valued.


I'm very glad he likes it here! Me being a father myself can understand the importance of him learning and enjoying the forum and the animal world in general, I will try and keep a eye out for people that don't understand or know the facts on the matter.

Further more, I would like to donate a Idolo nymph or 2(I also have some Budwings which are a little easier to raise) if you think it would be OK, and if happy1892 would like one? Just PM me.  

All the Best,

Nick


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## brancsikia339 (Mar 4, 2012)

Sporeworld said:


> _(Not a Yo Momma joke, but....)_
> 
> Why can't you hear a Pseudocreobotra go to the bathroom...?
> 
> Because the P is silent!


That's a really good one!


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## patrickfraser (Mar 4, 2012)

You're Momma's so old her ovipositor is shriveled.


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## agent A (Mar 4, 2012)

Your mamas so ugly she made popa spurca jealous :lol:


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## CoolMantid (Mar 4, 2012)

Your mom is so stupid she tried feeding a large grasshopper to brunners stick.


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## agent A (Mar 4, 2012)

Your mamas so dumb she tried to play a gongylus gongylodes


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## kunturman (Mar 4, 2012)

Your mama is so old thet her first pet matis is preserved in amber.


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## sporeworld (Mar 5, 2012)




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## sinensispsyched (Mar 5, 2012)

I know it's not the same thing, but my sister has down syndrome.


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