KevinsWither
Well-known member
I think that since I have been on this forum for long enough. It is time to tell you people that I have Aspergers. I believe that CosbyArt is aware of this, but I am at a time where darkness has officially come in. I am in 10th grade, 15, have Aspergers, and in the IB program. Now I will begin with when I am really young, and making all of this short and sweet.
I always had a hard time communicating with neruotypicals, even online. This has caused me some turnmoil and conflict with some sellers, not mentioning any names. When I was in preschool, I was diagnosed with autism. This put me in a Special Education classroom. Now I was comfortable in it as I am able to almost function. I had these really hard huge interest in insects (that would later get me onto this forum and make my dream of owning mantids a reality), fish (marine biology in general too), fishing, and later on, PC gaming, autism itself, food science, and many others. My teachers would use these interests to help me learn math, reading, writing and other stuff. Though when I was in a normal classroom, I had to go through it (which I can mainly do today). Now I was bullied by many in school for doing these interests and having autism, even though people stood up for me. In third grade, I was catching ladybugs and this girl snitched on me and I was trying to explain myself, but I was unable. This made me go into a mental meltdown. I started to cry (now I don't). Now from this point onward, I felt a sense of loneliness.
Now to middle school, situation improved a bit better, but I had to navigate myself onto the world. I had a speech therapist, but I pass for neurotypical now on the surface. I had her until 6th grade. I was as socially awkward and I had trouble navigating. Even today I do. But within 6th grade onwards, I always felt jealous of those who did a higher level class. This made me want to surpass them. And that would pull me into a conflict with a girl that I both liked and disliked. Long story short I got her in 8th grade (when it ended) via explaining something in really short terms that the whole class understood. This time period is also when I caught a Mediterranean mantis. It was young and I seemed to know how to care for it. I liked the first guy. But he died by accident via tape when I was letting him crawled on my hand, he jumped on the tape. I felt bad. A few mantids of the same species later, I decided to find more mantids. Now I recontacted my special ed teacher and she knows my interest in mantids and stuff I mentioned before. She helps me navigate this very complex world.
Now into the modern day, the first exotic mantids I got were double shields. A sexed pair. I really liked the species and I am still looking for a few to this day. Then came the Giant asian mantids. And after that came the African lined mantis. And after a few new zealands, pinstriped mantids, and finally, I have a sexed pair of ghosts and 4 japanese boxer mantids. Along with a vinegaroon, three devil scorpions, black widow, and finally, tommorow, the three assassin bugs. My interest in bugs finally came alive. Now here comes where I am today. I have dated a person (two years older than me). She had a lot of the things I liked (she actually had a huge interest in my bugs), but she is half Korean, half Hispanic, and she studies a lot and circumstances made the relationship unstable. Normally, I systematically focused on other things. But when my ex returned from Korea to my school, I got scared. Now in IB, we have a lot of work, and keeping my mantids healthy (cause I care for them, and there like my friends and family), is a priority so I try to balance my school with mantids and family. I also have a middle years project and I am trying to find supplies for the aquaponics system. Keeping my grades up (A's and some B's) is another thing. Sorry if I wrote too much, just needed to vent from the last few weeks. If you wish to ask me anything about me in general or on anything appropriate, feel free to do so. Just my experience so far.
I always had a hard time communicating with neruotypicals, even online. This has caused me some turnmoil and conflict with some sellers, not mentioning any names. When I was in preschool, I was diagnosed with autism. This put me in a Special Education classroom. Now I was comfortable in it as I am able to almost function. I had these really hard huge interest in insects (that would later get me onto this forum and make my dream of owning mantids a reality), fish (marine biology in general too), fishing, and later on, PC gaming, autism itself, food science, and many others. My teachers would use these interests to help me learn math, reading, writing and other stuff. Though when I was in a normal classroom, I had to go through it (which I can mainly do today). Now I was bullied by many in school for doing these interests and having autism, even though people stood up for me. In third grade, I was catching ladybugs and this girl snitched on me and I was trying to explain myself, but I was unable. This made me go into a mental meltdown. I started to cry (now I don't). Now from this point onward, I felt a sense of loneliness.
Now to middle school, situation improved a bit better, but I had to navigate myself onto the world. I had a speech therapist, but I pass for neurotypical now on the surface. I had her until 6th grade. I was as socially awkward and I had trouble navigating. Even today I do. But within 6th grade onwards, I always felt jealous of those who did a higher level class. This made me want to surpass them. And that would pull me into a conflict with a girl that I both liked and disliked. Long story short I got her in 8th grade (when it ended) via explaining something in really short terms that the whole class understood. This time period is also when I caught a Mediterranean mantis. It was young and I seemed to know how to care for it. I liked the first guy. But he died by accident via tape when I was letting him crawled on my hand, he jumped on the tape. I felt bad. A few mantids of the same species later, I decided to find more mantids. Now I recontacted my special ed teacher and she knows my interest in mantids and stuff I mentioned before. She helps me navigate this very complex world.
Now into the modern day, the first exotic mantids I got were double shields. A sexed pair. I really liked the species and I am still looking for a few to this day. Then came the Giant asian mantids. And after that came the African lined mantis. And after a few new zealands, pinstriped mantids, and finally, I have a sexed pair of ghosts and 4 japanese boxer mantids. Along with a vinegaroon, three devil scorpions, black widow, and finally, tommorow, the three assassin bugs. My interest in bugs finally came alive. Now here comes where I am today. I have dated a person (two years older than me). She had a lot of the things I liked (she actually had a huge interest in my bugs), but she is half Korean, half Hispanic, and she studies a lot and circumstances made the relationship unstable. Normally, I systematically focused on other things. But when my ex returned from Korea to my school, I got scared. Now in IB, we have a lot of work, and keeping my mantids healthy (cause I care for them, and there like my friends and family), is a priority so I try to balance my school with mantids and family. I also have a middle years project and I am trying to find supplies for the aquaponics system. Keeping my grades up (A's and some B's) is another thing. Sorry if I wrote too much, just needed to vent from the last few weeks. If you wish to ask me anything about me in general or on anything appropriate, feel free to do so. Just my experience so far.
